I thought about Crawling back.....

To my New Psychiatric Nurse
But I decided to try going without Medication
And distancing myself from my toxic relationship
With my Sister
She's the one that rocks my Boat
She says she wants to help
Whilst condemning me
And judging me
By being bullying and abusive
And always blaming my behaviour
To take advantage
And then twist the finger of blame
Onto me
It is almost Sociopathic
She spends her time
Sabotaging my relationships
And it takes enormous Courage
To walk away from her Shadow
but I feel the weight lifting off me already
No amount of Psychiatric Medicine
Could put paid to the damage
She has wreaked in my life anyway
No Drug can protect you from thirty years
Of Character Assassination
Because your father Raped you
And they took his side for the money!
Utterly Disturbed it took me thirty years
To realise what a dangerous and precarious
Situation I had got myself into
God Bless my father
For in spite of what he did
He was KIND by Comparison
Lust is a Deadly Sin
But Greed is even Uglier!

I remember....

Coming home to my mother
In bed every afternoon
On a diet of Antipsychotic
Largactol
To be precise
Now my little brother
Is going the same way
Can't remember to put lids on buckets, etc.
I'm so sick of the Platitudes
The put downs
And the Degradation
I would plant myself
Outside Parliament
Waiting to be Euthanised
If it wasn't for my Son
But the point is
This can't go on forever
Not to Our Children's Children!!!

I'm Still Nauseous

When Epilim is known to cause nausea and itching
I'm advised to go off my Anti-depressants
Have Quetiapine
Which makes me even itchier
And now I've got the Restless leg Syndrome
That Olanzepine caused
Along with the Tardive Dyskinesia
When your own Son coins a phrase for you
That your occupation is
"Fornicating with Spiders"
Because that is how little you do...............
And even he notices the Tardive Dyskinesia
And the Psychiatrist doesn't
When your mind "Echoes"
Because it is so stuck
From Antipsychotics shutting down the Dopamine in your Brain
Haven't I the right
To ask Questions
And point out the
Obvious failings of the
Psychiatric System
We're all so HOT on
PLATITUDE
When it comes to the Mentally Ill
And covering up
Our mistakes
Is basically all we do here
In New Zealand
I feel like "An enraged Weasel in a Cage"
And I am far from a "Happy Camper"

HELP
HELP
HELP
S
O
S
TO TINKERMAN

And now I'm off

Anti Depressants
Was that in the best interests
Am I Manic?

Is it Right?

To Bury the victim
And Watch from Afar
Nobody Nobody even reads
For everyone is 
Too Ashamed to talk
About Mental Illness
We are only Allowed to be happy
Isn't it Better to be Honest
To farm Our Brothers
And Sisters
as Guinea Pigs
Everyone is Ashamed to even Comment
What is going on??????
When I am Dust
I am your Equal
For What difference
Is there between Humans
We all wake to enjoy the Day
No matter what
Creed or Colour
Or State of Health
Shouldn't We all enjoy this Earth?
Upon this Earth
I have only
Ever Known
Shame
For being 
Born to Mental Illness
to Live with Mental Illness
And to Die
With Mental Illness
If you respected what was Right
In the first place
I would not be left
Mindless at an Early Age
This is How We must NOT treat Our Fellows
I BELIEVE
+
+
+

And the Truth is.....That We don't like the TRUTH

How can we go on
Invalidating Our Fellow Human Beings?
How can we do this?
I have only Injustice
I was accused of having a good Brain once
Once Upon a time when I can't remember
I can only
Attest 
That We are going the 
WRONG WAY
In treating the Mentally Ill
This is a Global Issue
That Our fellow Humans
Are literally Deprived
Of their Minds
And left to fend for themselves
In Hostile Communities
The Lone Wolfs
The Nutters with their Nervous Twitches
When will We Acknowledge the
RIGHTS
Of Our Fellow Human Beings
Alexa
I still Love your friendship
But I hide my lost mind
I grow
Queerer
And Angrier by the Week
Because drugs
Introduce a State of
Permanent Angry Psychosis
I didn't possess a Switch Blade
I was Gentle
We must Nurture the Mentally Ill
Not Reduce them to Shells???