Oh Jesuit Priest!  If only I could find it.  I have been at the Wailing Wall for 2,000 Years

My Two
Best
Where
of Dame Te Atairangikaahu
+ The Prime Minister
But May
We have
A Culture
That put's
Our Most
Vulnerable
OUT
The Door
In God's
Eyes
We
Are
All
Equals
Uncle Milton's Spirit
Lives
Here
And
I
would like
to
Pass on
Messages
from
Him

Perhaps I would like to set up this place as a Charitable Trust where People could thrash out ways to make the Welfare System KIND and Non Punitive.  That would be my Greatest Wish

I Would envisage a Welfare System that Provided a more Comfortable Existence, than as Bill Birch said "A Subsistence" existence.  We must want better for Our Fellows than that. Victims of Crime, etc, etc all need at least $1000 per week.  There should be no Income testing.  That is Abusing Human Right and making them feel like Criminals.  Income rises should be at the same rate that the Governments Wages are increased.  PLEASE

What if I were to PROVE that at the Heart of Our "Social Welfare" Country lies a PUNITIVE System that separates and CONDEMNS.  With a Living Wage that was not punitive but held Up one Another as Equals……that should not be ABUSED and Scoffed at by the very people that are supposed to care.  We need System that holds Us more up to the Light.  Isn't Welfare supposed to be about CARE.

I did "Violeta Elvin and yet I am made to go around like a common Criminal on my knees in the process of Breakdowns where I am even shut off from Hospital Care.  In future we simply must give people a Living Wage and a warm caring Society to flourish in.  We cannot go on with a Society that pays Our Prime Minister a Wage of nearly $9,000 per week and I, as a Vulnerable Mental Patient get $214.  The discrepancy between Rich and Poor is there in Every Country but the degree of hatred towards Beneficiary's is Shameful.  I am not even allowed to be on a Jury so Society Spurns Hatred and allows the ABUSE to go on.

My favourite
Artistic
Word
Is Asymmetry
Jesus
Once
Lived
For All
Of Us
and not
Just the
Chosen
Few

4 It is
When
We choose
Not to
Hate
One Another
That we learn to
Love
If we
All felt
Safe
We would
All
Flower
As God Wishes
It is
Wonderful
That President
Obama
Has met the Pope
I simply
Pray
that in future
We Acknowledge
A Person's Worth
Rather than
Just
Their
Failings
In the Future
As We
Did
With Vincent van Gogh

Would
We
that
On Election Day
or
On a Sunday
Fan
Out
Across Nation
The Enfranchised
With the Disenfranshised
And realize
Once
+ for
All
These
Are Brothers
These
Are
Our
Sisters
Let Us
Not CONCEMN

So if we lined up the
Two Sides
And then
Put them through
As
Weaves
Of Human Fabric
We would
Learn
How to
Love the
Judged

It would
Be My
Wish
that
We issued
Our Children
With Living Wage
As
Opposed
To
Benefits
That
Keep
Us
Living in Shame
Mental Illness
Means
People
Need
to be
Gentle
With 
CARE

For there are
Two sides
to this
Community
The Doctors
Prefer
not to entertain
"The Half Baked"
As they call them.
Winston Church and I both agree
What is the
POINT
In fighting Wars
If we don't
PROTECT
Our
Most Vulnerable
+ Their Children's Children
We should
Assign
Those
Declared
Mentally INVALID
Living Wage
and not
Keep them
On their
Knees
Whilst
Degrading them
Behind their Backs
There is only
So Much
A Human Being can take
…….

It would be a simple thing to
PROVE
that ever since
I have been
DIAGNOSED
With Bi-Polar
I have been
treated
With Hostility
Even by my Doctors
When my Psychiatrist
Dr Cliff
said that "My Behaviour was sow Inappropriate that it was not a wonder ………… tried to murder me"
+ my G.P.
Backed him up
And when I applied for a job
In my G.P.s Surgery
He said "It would be cruelty …………..(to dumb animals) to give me a job
even though I had just passed in Legal Secretarial Training
What hope is there
If everyone judges YOU
+ no wonder so many people
Hang Themselves
Or turn to Drugs
Or Alcohol
+ Cigarettes

Where is the Protection if the very people caring for you are the most likely to CONDEMN you!

And if you
Euthanize
Monkeys
Why not me
If I request it?
But please
Save Our
Children
May the
Future be gentle
And
HAPPINESS
be
FELT
in Old Age
May
Trust abound
But my
Heart
Is
Black and Blue

It is very Sad that all those People were lost in the South Indian Ocean

To the Delphinium + Jesus

Wouldn't
It be
Nice
If on
Election Day
We
All
Held
Hands
All
Over the Land
of
Aotearoa
And
Helped
One Another
As Equals
Not
Bums
+
Users
2B
Blind
The Most
Important
Thing
Is Love
Without that
None of Us
Function
Even if You
R Mad
You need Love
4 that is what
Heals
Never mind Paternalism
How about
Simple
Fair Protection
Every one of Us
Needs Rights
And that
Must
Include
The Mentally Ill
Not just as a Link
On the Gravy Train
Processing the Mentally Ill
With Disdain
When Will We finally
PROTECT?

I've been trying to put my finger on why Mental Patients generally do so badly in the free World.  It is because We label them as Mental.  I got 88% in Maths and after my first Breakdown I wasn't even allowed to use the Till in a Cafe.  What we are doing to Mental Patients is telling them that they are unwelcome in Society.  How can we do this and continue to dish out Medication when the Basic Building Blocks of Society need to Change.  We cannot have an A.C.C. which sweeps most of the Problems under the Carpet.  If we Granted a Living Wage that would be $1000 a Week and let them survive without Stress, if they were deemed INVALID, and let them pay for their teeth to be done, etc we would fiscally Protect the Sufferer so that they can choose where they Live and with Whom they Live with rather than a Top Heavy System which does not Care enough about the emotional needs of Living Souls.  We need acceptance, rather than being told you're too Depressed or inconsistent or dumb or needy, etc, etc.  Our Society Shuns the very people we're supposed to Protect.  Surely we should move towards Courtesy and every Child should be considered as Equals in Gods Plan.  That is my Simple Wish

PLEASE
PLEASE
PLEASE

If a flower
Comes
Before Us
Do We
Pick every Petal off
And
Discard it
We Admire
The
Flower
And allow
It to drink
The Water
Of Kindness
Why do we
Have to
Make the Grade?
To fit into Society
Why can't
We walk freely
Without Judgement
+ Derision
Fueling Our
Fear

And
If
We See
a
Butterfly
Then
Surely
It
Not
be
For Us
To Clip
It's Wings
+ Dissect
It

4 It
Is
A TREASON
2 JUDGE
The Mentally Ill
+ Not Support
Them
So They
Need Not
Fear
ABUSE

4 If
I
Now
Am
As a Monkey
That Out
Of Kindness
To Animals
You Euthanaise
Then
What Of
Accepting
Responsibility
With
Gentility
RATHER
Than
Leave
Them
to make
Their
Way
In
Fear
With the Doors
Shut
On the Hospital

I wanted
to learn
About
Psychiatry
So that I
Could
HELP
My Mother
What I have
Learned
Is it is
An
Exclusive Club
Relegating
Our
Children
to the
Scrap Heap
When
they
are Some
of
Our
Most
Intelligent
If they
Are Designated
Unable
To
Work
They should
be
Provided
With
the Same Wage
that it would
Cost
to Keep
Elderly
People
In their Beds
Most of All
They
Should
Be Protected
Against
Prejudice
I was Laughing Stock

That what
Grandma
Wants
That
Every Child
Between
Heaven
and
Earth
If they
Are
Loved
+ Protected
By Honest
Laws
.
.
.
+ to be
Afforded
A Living Wage
that They
May meet
Their
Commitments
+ Not Stress
In the Modern World


And "Here's to Winston Churchill'"

And if
We are
Deemed
INVALID
then
We should
Be Protected
+
Not
SHUNNED

We can
Not
Go on
Simply
Kicking
People
To the Curb
When they
Fall Down
Prejudgement
Isn't
FAIR
Equal
Rights
Should
Prevail

At the moment
Society
Justifies
Hatred
Of the Mentally Ill
That needs
To Be
STOPPED

For
If
Every Sufferer
Were
Simply
PAID
What it would
Cost
to Hospitalise
Them
They could
Afford
A Good Psychiatrist
Batting for
Them
and
Not
A Degrading
System
They need
FREEDOM
From
Continuing
ABUSE
+ Judgement
We must
SHIELD
The Mentally Ill
Rather than
CONDEMN THEM

We Simply
Can not
Go on
In this Country
Condemning
the Mentally Ill
And then
Cutting
the Apron
Strings
+
Throwing
Them
in the
Too Hard Basket
If we paid
A Living Wage
There would be
An enormous
Turn Around
+ We would
Reduce
STIGMA

We can not
Simply
Go on
Accessing
Victims
+ the Mentally Ill
As "Wastes of Space"
Instead of A.C.C.
Which does
Not Support
They should be
Given
A Living Wage
So that
They
Can
Choose
Their Care
Rather
Than
Spend their Lives
Being
Insulted
By the very
People
That are
Supposed
to Care
for THEM

And if
We are to
Judge People
As Invalidated
4 Not being able
2 Compete
Then
Surely
We should
Allow
Them
Choice
Of Psychiatrist
And
Choice
of Psychologist
And enough
Money
to
Afford
Dentist
and
Flowers
Upon the Table
So that
They
are not
Forced
to buy into
Abuse
In the Public
Health System
That should be
The Right of
Victims
And the Disenfranchised

For Shouldn't
Those
Diagnosed
With a Mental Illness
Not be deemed
Lesser
than Equals
+Not be Afforded Care
But be
Funded
to access
CARE
that does
Not
JUDGE

I see
A living
Wage
Helping
Vulnerable
People
Access
Care
Is better
than
CONDEMNATION
Of Society
I
Was
A
Good Enough
Artist
that
Surely
I
Unlike
Vincent
That
I could have been
Afforded
Some
Dignity
Instead of
Just being
An Identity
Factor
in a family
May Victims
have
Independence Day
Rights

I would
Choose
A New Hospital
That didn't
Deny me
Augmentation
After Causing
Cancer
+ then
And only
Then
I might
Smile
Again

I WOULD CHOOSE
to go back
to Charitas

If we
PAID
the Victim
Half
As much
As we
PAY
to Keep
Criminals
In Our Care
People
Could
Choose
Who
Gave them
Their Care
+ Not be
CONDEMNED

At the moment
I am seen
As Invalid
Perhaps
I should be
Seen
As Equal
=

4 So Solemn
Is
Discrimination
Our Children
Do Not
Reach
Their
Full Potential

SIMPLE
RECIPE
4 SOCIAL
REFORM

So
That
The Men and Women
Can see their
Children
Raised
In FREEDOM
Every child
Should be
Appointed
A Living
Wage
Which
My Sister
Agrees
Should Be One Thousand Dollars
A week
So they can
Meet Their
Needs
In a Modern Society
And afford
HELP
Rather
than be
DISDAINED
in the
Public
HEALTH
System
So if
We could
Not
DISCRIMINATE
WE WOULD
ALL be
TRULY
EQUALS
I should
PRIDE
Myself
And
Yet
I am HATED

So It we were
To Appoint
a Living Wage
to EVERYONE
that falls
to THEIR KNEES
We would no longer
Discriminate
And get
ANGRY
at Our Fellow Man
I am
Seen
As an Angry
Bludger
Rather
Than
Seen
as
an
Artist
Please
Remedy this……………………………….

For may we
Not about
Pragmatism
But Idealism
+ Kindness
+ Trust

+ If
It is
Fair
+ Kind
to Euthanaise
Monkies
Who's
Behaviour
Patterns
Have Changed
Is it
Not Fair
to
Euthanaise
A Human Being
If She requests
We cannot
go on
Victimising
The Mentally Ill
and then
Laughing
As they
Turn
to their Graves

And I
Would like
to Speak
With Banki Moon
+ hear
That as we go
Forward
into to New Era
Every Child
Is Valued
With Rights
To Equality
+ Living Wage

Vincent van Gogh
Committed
Suicide
at 34
He should
have been
PAID
a LIVING WAGE
and then
He would
Have had
Dignity
But because
He was not
Recognised
in a Hostile
Society
He killed Himself
We could do
Well by Vincent
And every living Being
that comes after him
If we
Acknowledge
People's
Worth
Rather
than farm Them
as weak Links
in the
CHAIN

4 When
The Psychiatrists
have BANNED
me from
THEIR OFFICES
does that not
PROVE
that I have
Been SHUNNED
And
If
the DISDAIN
is so OBVIOUS
then
Surely
I SHOULD
be
Granted
Euthanasia
With the Promise
that
We all
Get
treated like
Human Beings
Not just
The Elite
Few
As is the Present
Capitalist System
We need
to Protect
the Vulnerable
And on a Fiscal Level
Support
Every one's needs
That is to be
Accepted
+ treated
As an Equal
That is the
ONLY
Way forward
At the moment
We are a Clown System
That only
Favours
The Strong

And if I can
PROVE
that as the Victim
I was Punished
+ Judged
Harshly
By EVERYONE
My behaviour
Is
The Result
of Years
of Struggling
With the Hatred
We as
A Society
Off
to the Mentally Ill
Unfortunately
I can Understand
Why people
Bully
+ Murder
That
is
Sad

So that
If I
Was
2 PROVE
that as a Psychiatric Patient
I have experienceD
34 Years
of Abuse
As a Human Being
By the Waikato
Hospital
Then perhaps
In a Court of
LAW
You would
Simply
Have to
Grant me
Euthanasia
And
Swear
by
Almighty God
To treat the
Children
of Psychiatric Patients
BETTER
PLEASE
by Granting them 
A Living Wage
Rather than
Relegating them
To Poverty
+ Shunning them
PLEASE

Everyone
Should
Be
Kept Safe
and
Sound
+ We can't
Go on
Just
Burying it
Under the Carpet

4 HOW
CAN
WE BURN
BRIDGES
if We
Don't
Burn
Bridges

4 What
It is like
to live
On the Fringes
of Society
+ 2B forever
HATED

And may
All
the Children
In the future
be HAPPY
and Safe
PLEASE

Oh well
It will be all
Swell
Just wait
Now
And
Watch

4 long is My Spirit
Longing to go to Salvador Dali
Where We can Laugh Again

4 DOESN'T THE WHOLE
WORLD
NEED to make
A Shift
In the 21st Century
Toward
TRUTH
+ Justice for ALL
And doesn't'
that include
The Mentally Ill

AND IN THE A.C.C.
Programme
as it stands
Is that I am
Not to be
Given
Treatment
Even though
I am a PRODUCT
of Harsh Regimes
and Harsh Judgemental
Medicine
How can it be
That I am
A virtual Ginnea Pig
And as you fall
to the Bottom
You a encourage
that Suicide
Is the only
Answer?
??
?
What does the Pope
think about this PLEASE
++
+

SO PLEASE PRESIDENT PUTIN
PLEASE
ALL  PRIME MINISTERS
HELP THE vulnerable
Please
Don't HATE 
Us
for that is where
We 
FALL
Down
I have lived in
TERROR
All my life
For it seems
We are about
Judgement
Ailenation
Subsistence
and Disdain
In Our Colonial Country
We are more often than not
Be apt to be excessively
CLEVER
+ Heart less
toward the Mentally Ill
All I ask
is that they be
Not so Heartless
I have been condemned
ALL the way through
Waikato Hospital
And now
With disdain
They force me out of
their care
Like some dumb animal
Without SOUL
+ Brain
Now that they have completed
What is equivalent to
FRONTAL LOBOTOMY
via MEDICATION
Suddenly too dumb
to fend for myself
And scared
of Walking in my Community
From the time
My
Our Father in Heaven
Hallowed be they Name
Isn't it time
That Our Children
of survivors of the Mentally Ill
move forward
With Joy
And not HATRED
in Our hearts
for that is a RECIPE
for abuse
PLEASE DON'T FARM US LIKE DUMB ANIMALS BECAUSE WE HAVE A MENTAL ILLNESS + allow the continuing ABUSE.  Every child must be valued and not just the 2% that succeed PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
GRANDMA RETA is not HAPPY 
+ may I to be put
In a safe Turret
And to
Watch
The CHILDREN
in Happiness
Grow
towards
Their Truth
And before
We were
Born
We are Destined
We must treat each Other
As equals
Not as the Present
Capitalist
System Works
Psychaitric Patients need
SHELTER
Not derision 
And Hostile
Sentiment
PLEASE

At the moment I liken the present situation to like a pack of piranha's having a feeding frenzy upon the Mentally Ill instead of achieving a better System in which people with these sorts of disabilities can thrive.  We invite them for consult than degrade and point out their weaknesses rather than funneling their strengths and providing safe work places in the Community.  Sexual abuse victims are labelled as damaged goods, etc, etc, etc.  Psychiatry and Psychology are full of Paternalist Judgement and do not help people as much as underline their victimization.  How are people to have a chance at leading GOOD lives if we condemn the very people we are trying to help the moment they walk out the door.  Psychiatry still is barbaric in that sense.

When you are not allowed
To be on a Jury
You are not welcome
In a Doctors Office
Or a School
Or even a town
Or neighbourhood
And you are expected
To ignore all this
And show Gratitude
For whatever
MERCY
Comes your way
And stay isolated
Within the Community
With growing anger
When you reach Out
People assess you
As Mental
When it does not matter
Who takes advantage
Or rapes you
It matters only
That they die early
of SUICIDE
or in Psychiatry
We are fatalistic
about negligence
If they are
MENTAL
They were just
"A waste of Space"
Anyway
So
No GREAT LOSS
When we THANK THEM
for poisoning
Our siblings
And our
Mums and Dads
Surely it is time that we faced the fact that we need
BETTER SOLUTION

So, if it is true, that effectively we are hounding the Mentally Ill into their graves and that the present situation is appallingly Inhumane, then, surely, something must be done about it.  As it is we say we are concerned about the rate of suicide in this Country but GIANT steps need to be made to make Our Society a user friendly place for those that are a bit more vulnerable.  We need the Powers that be to set up safe houses where people can work and engage without fear of Discrimination PLEASE.  I have lived most of my life in the shadows of Our Society and I can't see a way forward and if I am disappointed and frustrated and angry because there is no place for me then I guess that many more disenfranchised citizens are acting out in the same way or worse because the community is so Hostile to them.  Sure we offer empathy and encouragement but without Workhouses whereby people can make a contribution in a safe environment Our Society is a pressure cooker for all sorts of anti-social behaviour.  The only way that I could cope was to live in a fantasy world and now that I am facing reality and experiencing the grief I simply have to say that there needs to be drastic change.  We need Rights and Work and encouragement.  Not continual Judgement as is the present state of affairs PLEASE.

We Revere the 
All Blacks
So much
that even
The Prime Minister
Wants the FLAG
to bear the Silver fern.
Good on Johnny Kirwan
For making a stand
To help 
Those with 
Depression
But in
An 
INCLUSIVE
Society
Most of us
Might 
Be able
To flush
Those
Psychiatric Drugs
Down 
The toilet.
It's fear
that
Drives Mental Illness
to full flight
And consumes us

If I were to be completely honest I'm inconsistent with Medication and any Doctor in the world would have justification for throwing me to the wolves and leaving me to my own devices.  But what I'm saying is that Society has to make a place for us if there is to be HOPE for those that suffer from moderate to severe Mental Illness PLEASE.  Mental Patients are still the people that Society loves to hate and it is no wonder that they live up to expectation and turn to self destructive behaviour.

I think the most fascinating thing is that I have quite an audience in Russia.  But for the grace of God even top Politicians could easily find themselves in the same position as me.  I'm not GAY per sae but I have a Nephew that is and I don't want ANYONE, sane, insane, Asian, English or African American OR GAY to feel DISCRIMINATION.  That really should be the challenge of the New Age.  I would not Act out so much if I was not stifled by FRUSTRATION at not feeling safe enough ever to be able to contribute.

Perhaps something will be done eventually to address the ABYSS and give us HOPE but in the meantime I'm just sad to say that I no longer have the COURAGE to commit Suicide so instead I shall simply BITCH and BITCH until I see a change.  Dr Bogdon whose name is interesting and unfortunate literally "flushed" me away and arrogantly prouded himself for it.  I don't dislike him so much as pity the hopelessness of the situation for Psychiatrists and their Patients alike.  Most Psychiatrists are nearly as mad as their patients and Doctors simply pride themselves of their PRAGMATISM when every psychiatric patient is a HUMAN BEING and not just a Statistic.  PLEASE we must make changes that build a more INCLUSIVE SOCIETY

SO THE PSYCHIATRISTS ARE ENABLED TO MAKE GIANT COCK UPS AND HERE IN NEW ZEALAND WE JUST BURY THE MISTAKES.  Life's a bitch especially when you need a SHRINK

SO IS THERE ANYONE BRAVE ENOUGH TO COMMENT OR AM I JUST TALKING TO MY DERRIERE?

I love ALL my Psychiatrists.  I think they are basically decent people with the best of intention but by it's very nature Psychiatry CONDEMNS

My Partner thinks that I should take a tape recorder into my consultations to prove that they flatly deny that I have a Mental Illness so that they can Punish me with denial of treatment.  DOES THAT SEEM HUMANE?

If my son, who does not appear to have Bi-Polar, has a little girl, I would hope that, if she does have Bi-Polar, that she can live a life of DIGNITY and acceptance, which I certainly have not.

Psychiatrists
Patronize
PLATITUDE
play down
Do not acknowledge
A patients virtues
CONDEMN
Undermine
Weakness
Turn a blind eye
Ignore
Desperation
Offer no 
SOLUTION

And whats more I am appalled by the fact that now that we don't have the resources to cater for our Psychiatric Patients Psychiatrists are simply ignoring their Patients suffering to the point you have to threaten Suicide or Murder to get care……and even then it seems they still don't treat you.  It is nothing more or less than disgusting that people that have lived with Mental Illness for decades are being fobbed off to G.P.s here in New Zealand.  It seems that the Psychiatrists are only interested in new cases.  I have been shunned by Mental Health Services and that really does disappoint me.  If only we could do without them all together I would be so happy.  They are a necessary evil but the level of compassion appears to be so low it astounds me!

Otherwise we just go on indefinitely, not changing the status quo, and accepting that murder, suicide and car accidents, alcoholism, drug addiction theft and burglary are caused because of the anomalies in our Society and we are too lazy to effect change.  At the moment so many Human Souls are raped by the dangers which the disenfranchised wreak in our Society and I believe that the positive effects of providing work and dignity rather than leave people languishing in the devils work shop would far our way the cost.  When people have hope they are less likely to be ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If we can provide opportunity for Intellectually handicapped people then, based on that model, we should give Drug Addicts, etc, safe environment with work associated to their level of recovery.

There is only one way to reduce Suicide and that is to provide a safety net for every living Soul in Our Communities, and that includes Psych Survivors, unemployed, Drug Addicts and ex-prisoners, and that is to provide Work Houses that reward effort and contribution.  We cannot go on simply paying out benefits which provide no sense of dignity.  Sure we, as a democracy cannot MAKE people work but if people see that they can make a contribution it will drastically reduce the SUICIDE rate.  There has to be a way out of the abyss for everyone.  

When the receptionist at a Doctors surgery asked a friend "What ward of the Nut House do you come from?" it is patently obvious that we are vicious rather than protecting the Mentally Ill.  I wish I had succeeded in my Suicide Attempt because what not succeeding meant was that I would have to put up with continual bullying and abuse from family and the majority of our Society.  When will we PLEASE make a concerted effort so that Psychiatric Survivors thrive alongside their fellow men and women in the 21st Century.  Unfortunately for me I now can relate to the ANGER which causes people to respond by committing mass murder and I should never have been hounded to even experience that loss of innocence.  I am not a Murderer but I am ANGRY.

It is a gray day and Cyclone Lusi has struck but the tail end of her abuse has turned out to be little more than blessed rain.   If my Reputation comes before me how do I possibly ever fit in to Our Society?  It was so obvious that Doctors and Lawyers do not even pay lip service to confidentiality that they don't deserved to be paid!

I contend that "Humanity" if you can call it that is basically in denial when it comes to suicide.  I know a woman who attempted suicide and didn't even tell her Doctor because she was too frightened of being labelled with a Mental Illness.  She woke up and went to work the next morning.  It takes less than a nano second for us to identify with that fear and yet we still wonder WHY do people commit suicide.  The answer is so obvious that Hope is not there for the Mentally Ill unless they feign control and swallow the drugs placidly and ignore the abuse that comes their way.

A Psychiatrist I was dealing with had the compassion to say "Poor Bastards" when considering those that sat as vegetables after heavy drug regimes in Psychiatric Hospitals.  What is happening now is that patients are given those same regimes and the Psychiatrists are simply turning a blind eye to the damage medication wreaks upon the Sufferers.  There is no A.C.C. for sufferers and they are left to wallow in distress and abject poverty.  Studies on Monkeys have proved that Olanzepine actually shrinks the brains of monkeys by 14 %.  It would be interesting to note how their behaviour patterns change and yet Psychiatrists sit back and virtually condemn the very people they are treating unless they feign positive outcomes through drug regimes.  It is high time that we conclude that relying on Psychiatric Medicine is not the answer and we must hold out Hope and Dignity or if we were to be Truthful perhaps we should simply slay them upon diagnosis rather than let them live interminable lives of shame and degradation.  I campaigned for Euthanasia even before I was diagnosed with a Mental Illness and now I just drift as a loose end toward my Grave with the full knowledge that even Psychiatric Services have shunned me because I haven't accepted the torture graciously.  I demand that I should have the sanctity and dignity of living in a Psychiatric Hospital rather than a hostile Community if I am loosing my mind completely.

I am not so much "Crazy" as living in terror because we are still so damning of the Mentally Ill.

In a truly "Christian" Society the onus would not be upon the weak to rally with the strong but the strong would more accommodate the weak.  It is perhaps too much to ask but I feel strongly that the situation is as bad as ignoring the Jews suffering discrimination at the hands of the Nazi's.  Since we have reached the 21st Century surely it is time that we share equally with every living Soul and not relegate a goodly portion of our Society to the dungeons of Despair and loneliness.  Sure we have benefits and for that perhaps we can be considered Humane but I know to what extent we degrade the Mentally Ill until they think that they can no longer go on.  If we live in terror of Social gatherings, and I am not the only one, then we really must think about creating an order in which every citizen is provided with an opportunity to make a contribution.  There should be no Abyss for us to fall into and we should be free from condemnation.  I trained for four years for employment and passed everything that was thrown at me but the fear of humiliation stopped me from succeeding and now Psychiatric Medicine and Drug Addiction so that most probably I could not compete with the Intellectually handicapped to pack pegs.  Please don't let this situation continue to ensnare the vulnerable until they commit suicide indefinitely.

The onus should not be upon the weaker citizens to lift themselves to meet the strong.  Rather it should be upon the strong to meet the Psychiatric Patients half way and create safe working environments for the mentally Ill with rewards for contribution.  Also we need zero tolerance of the bullying and abuse that is still happening in Our Society.  At the moment even the kindest of people still Judge the Mentally Ill.  It is a huge ask but otherwise we should face the reality that leaving people in such huge distress because the doors are closed is not the solution and perhaps we would be better to reopen Mental Institutions.

For I am tired of laying out the welcome mat when I'm judged so cruelly.  I am tired of this life but I know that almost every Psychiatric Patient suffers the same degradations until eternity unless we address the Abyss.  I tired of being treated like a dumb animal because I have a Psychiatric Illness.  Other people would kill for less and still we wonder why people turn to murder???????????????  I'm getting boring………………..but when will the torture of the Mentally Ill end.  When will we show solidarity and Protection instead of aiding and abetting the demise of, more often than not, innocent human beings?  When you see the same terror in fellow human beings even though they are brave enough not to say it how can they sit back and not notice the pain and the suffering.  There has to be a safety net so that Human Beings are not crushed until their very souls are unrecognizable.  PLEASE!!

So if Psychiatric medicine damages the minds of the sufferers and leaves them helpless and without memory surely we must find a better solution.  If the sufferers are left only to die cruel and slow Deaths then surely this situation must be addressed.

For if we do not bother to stream our most vulnerable how can we possibly consider ourselves a civilized Society.

When one finds oneself with neither the will, nor the enthusiasm to live in a Hostile Society one has to question the very building blocks of Our Society.  I pray for the day that we all can bask in Sunlight rather than be held in the darkness of fear.

At the moment the emphasis on treating the Mentally Ill is via medication.  When, even as children, we know the terror of developing a Mental Illness that we react with hostility towards those that suffer surely we must do more than offer pills and platitude to the Mentally Ill.

Perhaps I should be more grateful that I can live in freedom but the barriers to people with Mental Illness are more or less "invisible" but they surely do exist.   We are satellites to Society and drift with ever increasing desperation to our Deaths.   Feigning compassion and concern when the patient is in our midst we shove them out the doors of Hospitals or Doctors surgeries to face the condemnation of fellow citizens until they top themselves.

In such a situation the abyss becomes too great to negotiate and the sufferer gives up and turns to whatever crutch is available.  The only way to address this chasm is to offer sheltered employment to those that live with Mental Illness.  Same for drug addicts and ex-prisoners.

I honestly believe that if we offer safe haven for those that do not succeed in the form of the salvation of work we will have a much more constructive Society.  Fiscally giving Hope would lessen crime and the need for Doctors and Psychiatrists and Hospitals and Prisons, that are great expenses, to pick up the pieces.

When one simply lives in terror of one's fellow Citizens, when only Euthanasia can answer that level of Distress surely we are obliged to look at the very foundations of Our Own Society and open a place of safety for those Citizens that suffer from a Mental Illness.  To leave people frightened and condemned to subsistence is like a form of TORTURE.

I think it marvellous that we have such a thing as Psychiatrist but Psychiatry by definition targets the vulnerable as if they were "criminal" for being unwell.  A Compassionate Society would to it that every human being is protected.  What is there for the Mentally Ill but to feign happiness in a brutal Society or face ever increasing drug regimes until you are pushed into Alzheimer's at an early age.  Surely we have to be more proactive than we presently are.  PLEASE.  When 600 people kill themselves per year for fear of being shunned with Mental Illness surely we should at some stage address the systemic hatred that one acquires for ones fellow man simply because they have a Mental Illness.

So completely have my faculties been frozen that it is hard to write a sentence that makes sense.   But please please for those that come after me can we make a World where everyone has a place to stand by their fellow citizens in TRUST.  At the moment to be diagnosed with a Mental Illness is to be condemned to "Living Hell".  People are kind enough to your face but behind your back they derail and condemn.  I was told that my reputation came before me and indeed it does but when are we going to make a place for the mental and the vulnerable instead of vicious banter.  At the moment the mental live only up to expectation because of the Abyss that "Mental" becomes like living in abject terror worse than the greatest fears that man can behold.  Once the anxiety takes over their is little or no Hope for the Sufferer.   Don't condemn us to the scrap heap of Humanity please.

It's seems I have an Audience.

My Doctor once said that present day Psychiatry would one day be deemed Barbaric.  It is absolutely terrible to come to a place where you know that you can no longer function and to be left to your own devices in a hostile community that knows that you are Mentally Unwell.  There is no going back and who can dare to Hope when Hope is lost.

We provide all manner of help to the Mentally Ill but the Stigma is always there, beneath the surface and often we are more brutal to the Victims of crime than we are to the Perpetrators of the Crime.   If we cared about the Vulnerable we would not so harshly Judge them.  We would provide a Society that provided space for them and Protected them.  I do not see Protection.  I see only Condemnation and Isolation.
Bi-Polar is a genetic Illness.  It pops up Generation after Generation and from my experiences of the Mental Health System all Christianity is lost upon the Mentally Ill because we support them to be Victims rather than allow them to stand alongside fellow citizens and express their strengths.  We stand by and let them be walked over.   Psychiatric patients may as well be "things" rather than Human Beings because we do not respect their Rights.  We need to uplift the Mentally Ill and the Drug Addicts and those that commit Crimes until they can leave theirs crutches behind and walk in trust with the Communities that they live in.  We need a Society that does not insight fear and hatred.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE.  Every Psychiatric patient needs a Protective Lawyer and to be drafted into something that counts as gainful employment.  So terrible is the fear of Mental Illness because of the loss of Hope that it drives many of us Crazy just the thought of it.  When life becomes only grief and trauma the has to be a better way.  A lot of "crazy" people were Our geniuses so please give them Hope and harvest their abilities rather than simply accentuate their failings.  We must face up to the fact that when it comes to people that are a bit different or challenged we are still a Vicious and Hostile World and that is why we breed MURDERERS.  When will the change take place.  How can we happily live in a World of plenty whilst condemning to weaker among us to subsistence, isolation and compounded Insanity.   It might seem a backward step to place people back in Institutions but if we are but heightening their distress perhaps we should be Morally Obligated to find an answer.  The answer is that we offer them HOPE rather than this FARCE of tolerance.

I want my children, and your children, to have lives of HOPE